Naturally, all normal parents want a better life for their child. Most often, this desire is expressed as “our son/daughter should live better than we”, but the most farsighted moms and dads focus on really successful people (success is understood as social status and material benefits). And in order for their child to achieve well-being, parents do not spare money, effort and time for education.
Preschool training, school, colleges, additional sections, and university – of course, it is wonderful. But pedagogues at these institutions do not instill the most important things. So, what should parents teach their children?
Ironically, most people do not know how to love themselves. It’s about that bright and pure feeling that we give to our significant other, kids, parents – to anyone, but not to ourselves. True self-love (not narcissism) means respect, care (proper nutrition, physical exercises, healthy lifestyle), acceptance of oneself, development.
A person who really loves himself is full of positive emotions and able to do good things selflessly. Those who demand love from others often suffer because of its inner lack.
A school teaches us to learn. Parents should teach the child to doubt, not to take faith in all the data that comes into his brain. If you want to educate a Person, give him the skills to process information and form his own opinion about it. In addition, such upbringing will help the child to develop creative thinking. Standard people are not in high demand now.
It is very important to teach a child to appreciate what he has, not to be envious. Do not tell the child that others do not have what he has (thus instilling a sense of guilt and lowering the ambitions). Teach him to be sincerely grateful at the moment and to strive for more. It is also important to show the value of any life circumstances (even complex, unpleasant) and “uncomfortable” people, because they are the best teachers.
It is one of the main components of quality and effective relationships (both personal and business). Here is a list of things which a child should learn to respect:
- His own and other people’s space. The teenager should feel that he has personal space (his cave), in which he can feel safe, relax and regain strength. And neither parents nor anyone else has the right to enter this space without permission. Only in this way, the kid will learn to respect the private space of other people.
- His own and someone else’s opinion. As we have already said, the child must be taught to process information, form his own point of view on its basis. Also, he should understand that, if his vision is different from the opinions of others, it is a normal situation. He can substantiate his approach – not to prove, because there is a line, behind which the opinion of another person lies and requires respect.
- His own and other people’s time. First of all, respect for one’s own time consists in a setting of priorities. Already from a young age, the kid must understand what is important and paramount to him. In the future, this skill will help in the implementation of the important plans (time management). Respect for the time of people around you means punctuality, the absence of aimless conversations and actions, the habit of wondering whether a person has the opportunity to communicate with you at the moment.
- His own and someone else’s actions. Even if a person near you builds a tower from cubes, do not say that he is engaged in nonsense. Perhaps, for him, it’s a way to calm down or practice concentration – it doesn’t matter. If he does it, he needs it. Respect his choice and demand respect for your own actions.
- Personal and other people’s desires. If after a revelation about his wishes, the child hears that this is a nonsense which is not worthy of attention, he begins to be shy of his desires, and in a result, can completely forget how to “wish”. Such shyness can lead to negative consequences: he will either start living the dreams of other people or will devalue the desires in principle. Respect for interests also can be included in this category.
Ability to Enjoy
Only the unique people can enjoy every moment of life. But each person should be able to enjoy, at least, his own successes, achievements, really long-awaited and pleasant events. After all, what to strive for without such a pleasure?
To be Happy
It is the simplest and, at the same time, the most complex skill. It includes the abovementioned points and is expressed as a feeling of inner contentment – the state to which we all aspire, and which, for some reason, we postpone for later.
Not to Be Afraid of Failure
To learn something, a child should not be afraid of making mistakes, even failing. Young people need help to understand that learning is a long, slow process of trial and error. No great invention or scientific discovery has ever been made without a large number of trials and failures that preceded it.
Parents should teach children to be players! The only way to find out what they know and do not know is a little risk. Some moms and dads scare the kids to death. Who wants to try to answer a question or learn something new if success or failure is judged instead of evaluating the attempt?
Tell your son/daughter that there are no desperate situations. Do not scold the child for the low mark or criticism from the teachers. It is better to suggest ways out. Show that it is possible to overcome any difficulties. For example, if a student does not have time to write an essay because of intensive preparation for exams, tell him about the existence of essay writing services and other helpful auxiliary tools.
Adhere to these simple recommendations, and you will be able to educate a self-sufficient, successful, and most importantly, happy person. Good luck!